[One other] Humor

[Obamot]

This Deproges is a “psychological food”Exquisite

[GuyGadeboisTheBack]

This Deproges is of a “psychological food”Exquisite

You surprised me John ...

[1360]

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[thibr]

[Obamot]

[Janic]

great argument! this is a real humanism, this sense of sacrifice for others!

[Obamot]

My generosity has no limit (The world has changed what do you want ...)

Psychopaths are everywhere ... They have apparently reached the positions of decision-makers, even in the labs, ecstatic without limit on the techniques which one can modify the human genome, taking care of the details so that no one is mistaken (and omitting to underline the dangers) with - they say - perspectives “pleasing for scientific research“(And above all financial, of course, even other ultimate designs ... without for example 'asking the embryos' or viruses if they agree to the great leap 'transhumantism') without this arousing a stir or a generalized rejection in the average population, on the other hand it is necessary to treat “the profanity” that the internal revolt which results from it can arouse in some who dare humanism on “social networks”: that yes it is priority and essential ... to hell with freedom of expression, tomorrow it will be armed with the “gene therapy injection booklet” that we will have to bring to take the bus!

If Chaplin was still with us:

I would add that it is particularly shameful to have closed your account for fifteen days, if we still dare to protest here ...!
It makes you want to throw up everywhere.

[Macro]

It makes you want to throw up everywhere.

Go have fun ... Grit your teeth to keep the pieces

[Christophe]

Where should I post this?

[Obamot]

It makes you want to throw up everywhere.

Go have fun ... Grit your teeth to keep the pieces

It's the humor section, eh ...

For Macro who thinks I'd be ready to throw up in his cab

No, we don't throw up in a taxi
Anthology of behaviors to avoid for a lasting agreement with the corporation of taxi drivers.
By Tiffy Thompson
This article was published on VICE Canada and translated by VICE France. https://www.vice.com/fr/article/ev5ax7/ ... ns-un-taxi

How heartwarming it is to leave a crowded street to get into a calm and welcoming taxi. You can breathe again: check your phone, powder your nose, chat with the driver. Of course, it's tempting to get comfortable, really at ease, by telling, for example, the most embarrassing details of your last breakup to this gentleman who frankly didn't ask for so much.

The alcohol helping, the driver appears as an attentive and benevolent ear, a shrink, a friend. Except no. A driver is a man who will evaluate your behavior once you have slammed the door, giving you a bad mark if necessary. Here is a small list of behaviors to be banned in a taxi.

We were coming home from a bar in Waterloo when I was playing hockey. As a girl and my friend were frenzy at the top of their lungs, she suddenly asked the driver to pull over to the side. After throwing up her guts on the sidewalk, she got back in the cab and started kissing my buddy again. It disgusted me so much that I spat on the cab door when he dropped me off. Suffice to say that the driver was not delighted. - Marko C., Kitchener

When I was young and naive, a taxi driver picked me up. I don't know how, but I found myself smoking opium [Editor's note: it was probably not opium] in a hookah he had hidden in his trunk. He gave me his personal number and offered to take me wherever I wanted - until he realized I was lost. We smoked good opium anyway. - Lyn K., Toronto

One Friday in August, I ordered an Uber with a friend to go to Mississauga from downtown Toronto. It was a little after 13 pm and we were supposed to arrive at 14 pm. We had luggage with us. The driver was late, but he finally arrived. We took the highway. The driver sighed and huffed in exasperation. We were in traffic jams when he asked us if he could leave us there - in the middle of the freeway - and order another Uber. I started to laugh, thinking it was a bad joke. But then he started yelling at us, begging us to take another Uber. Apparently he was due in court at 14 p.m. He kept insulting us by yelling things like "shit world", telling us we were motherfuckers. My friend finally managed to calm him down. When we finally got out of the Uber, arrived at our destination, the guy asked us to give him five stars and tip him $ 15. We told him to go get fucked. - Derek W., Toronto

My evening conquest was about to vomit. I immediately felt bad for the poor taxi driver who was going to have to deal with this. I grabbed the first thing I had on hand - my cap. She filled it with vomit, and luckily we weren't too far from home, so it didn't leak. The driver expected the worst and was surprised at what I did to save the day. When we got there, she offered to wash my cap. But since I knew I didn't have a chance to sleep with her, I told her, “No, worry. It's just a cap ”(it was my favorite though). I threw it in a trash can. I didn't fuck that night, and I still blame myself to be honest. - Aaron G., Toronto

When I was 25, I felt the need to break up with my boyfriend, who I had been with for two years, to hang out with an 18-year-old guy for six months. It was quite an adventure. One evening in a taxi, I kept throwing my index finger on the back of the driver's head, as if I were holding a gun. I yelled "Bang bang, honey". After doing it three or four times, the driver pulled over to the side and yelled “You are not a nice girl! Get out of my taxi! We got out of the taxi, super happy we didn't pay anything. - Sam B., Montreal

Last winter, I was going to do a manicure, but I was late. Since I hate making people wait, I thought I was going to take an Uber. When the driver arrived, it started to snow. Apparently, the drivers take notice of our destination once we get into the vehicle. So when he saw that I was going to Parkdale from Mississauga (a 28 minute ride), he started to complain. He kept asking me, "How can you get me to drive downtown in this weather?" The snow was accumulating dangerously. “I should leave you at the next intersection. I don't need this. He repeated this every two minutes. “Do it! Leave me - I'll call someone else, ”I replied. "No, no it's okay," he mumbled. I couldn't figure out what the dude wanted. I was in an Uber pool, so we picked up a teenager and her friends in a parking lot. As the girl walked towards the car, the driver started yelling "Damn, she's fat!" She's not pretty like you. And damn, she and her friends are black. I hate driving black teens. I couldn't believe my ears. (Note that I am white and that my weight apparently corresponds to the shady standards of the driver, who was black to him.) So the teenager and her friends got in the car. We were tight like sardines. When the girls got out I got stuck again with that motherfucker driver trying to find a "shortcut". He totally ignored GPS and kept saying how rich he was and that he didn't need this job. Then he ended up changing the record and told me he was going to have a drink with a friend nearby, and that I was welcome. Fuck, but never in life. Finally, I was still an hour late. - Rachel S., Toronto

One night in LA, I meet a girl in a bar and decide to take her back to my hotel. My Uber arrives, we get in the back and start kissing. We're drunk enough to give a damn what the driver thinks, and then we had a 20 minute drive, so enough time to start heating the oven - if you see where I'm going. She begins to shake my tail like a prepubescent who discovers the handjob. It's starting to get hot. So hot that the driver pulls up, pulls out his phone and starts filming us. At the time, we didn't care, because we were high and ready to fuck like animals. This is where it gets really weird. As I kiss the girl, I hear a super fast masturbating sound. Like Flash Gordon. I ignore it and concentrate on my business. Then I hear it again, it goes even faster. The girl and I turn to the driver. The guy is jerking off while watching us, while filming us. "What the hell are you doing man? I yell. “Don't mind me - I'm just out of jail. Continue, ”the guy replies. I take the phone from the guy, and we escape from the car and immediately delete the video. The guy gets out of the tank, with the ankle socks on. He starts chasing us down the street with a fucking erection. I throw his phone at him, he tries to grab it, falls, and I'm pretty sure he broke his dick while falling. - J. Wunder, San Jose, California

It was ten years ago. My ex and I had gone out to a club. We were about to go to an after party, totally stoned on ecstasy. We stopped and bought cigarettes. There were disposable cameras on the counter. We bought one. Once in the taxi, my ex asked me to take lots of pictures of her vagina. The driver may have noticed, because there was a flash. I did not pay attention. - Larry R., Toronto

I have been an Uber driver for several years now. I've seen a whole bunch of shady stuff - guys selling dope, girls fingering in the backseat and asking me to join them. A girl once asked me to go with her to a wedding. Another, four girls threw up in my car. They always offer to clean - and do it really badly. All that to say that once, the application sends me to Yonge and Eglinton. It is 11 o'clock in the morning. I park in front of the house. Then the garage door opens and a girl runs towards me, totally naked. She starts knocking on my window, yelling "Open!" Let me in! I shake my head, and she says, "Please?" It's for a bet! I refuse again. She must therefore return to the house with the cars honking as they pass. Then the guy who ordered the race arrives, and explains this betting story. They had been partying all night long taking drugs and having sex in the garden. When they ran out of drugs, they called an Uber. His neighbors must hate him. Petey B., Toronto

Rather Protein? Creatine? Or Quarantine? I answer after

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